My week’s start…

Another week begins and I’ve got only one of 6 assignments covered. The other 5 are group assignments and the group members are the kind that make up the list, do zilch, and yet expect a free grade.
My work-out gets better by the day. Today’s triple set of 10′s abs crunches have me abuzz, I got to class in time,, listening to Regina Belle off a Walkman while I wait for the lecturer to show up.
Whilst watching tele last night, I learnt about the Freegan lifestyle where some people in New York pick food and furniture from the trash! Don’t be grossed out. These guys go through trash from hotels dumpsters, coffee shops, supermarkets….and the stuff that gets thrown out, like packs of milk a few days from their expiry date 4 days earlier, or  a pack of eggs thrown out because one was cracked…all this makes for loads of food, and these people pay an average of $10 a week on food, how cool is that?!
I’m giving it some thought, however the thought of trying to get you guys on the same thought train might attract reactions such as “Shaaa! Bandaba batya?!”
Till next time, easy does it.

Just when I thought I had it all in my stride…

I saw my ex at this new joint in town, with his madame…I wanted to leave as soon as I got there,but my girl convinced me otherwise. After one drink, I saw them leave, which kinda relaxed my urge to leave the party. I held it together until today, I’m in traffic, and it occurs to me that he’s moved on,and I’m still thinking…hurting…I broke down, tried to keep from ramming into the vehicle ahead of me as i had to repeatedly wipe the salty drizzle from my eyes…
And I don’t want to hear about, ‘time will healall wounds’ I know that for crying out loud!
I just need to find my happiness again, i need to occupy my thoughts and memory with something a lot more profound. A part of me wants to hate him, with the hope that I will feel better…I can’t do it. I know I’ve moved on, I just need to find my spring…I want to laugh again, beam with pleasure from anothers’ compliments to me, time spent with me.
And I need my Mother to cut me some slack…I don’t need the constant reminder that I’m single. And no match-making, please. I need the transition to be as natural as possible for me.
Feel free to listen, understand then pour out some words of wisdom.
Till next time, easy doe it

The Script – Breakeven

It has been plaguing my thoughts for the passed couple of hours. Then I stumbled across this song this morning, and couldn’t help but double back at how clearly’ it spoke to me. I’ll share the lyrics with you shortly.

I would like to say how glad I am that You’re doing as well as You are. You make a stethoscope look cool, lying on the left like that. I miss You, and yet I can’t bring myself to contact You. I want my friend back, but what right do I have, seeing as I’m the one that pulled the plug on it all?
I say a prayer for You every chance I get, which is a whole lot and in the same breathe ask God to steady me each time, lest I make a stupid mistake and make a fool of myself. Hubris would have a field day at my expense, so no. I’ll hold my peace.

You are looking well, and I’m grateful for that.
They are all happy thoughts, from the stolen kiss in the isle of Uchumi, to the ruse of sitting in Your lap while You tell me a story, on condition that I am a good girl
Your genius rep is crossing borders, and I smile.

I shall take it one day at a time. I want the best for You, I needed to say that.
A bientot Mon Cher

and for those lyrics…

I’m still alive but I’m barely breathing
Just prayed to a God that I don’t believe in
‘Cause I got time while she got freedom
‘Cause when a heart breaks, no it don’t breakeven

Her best days will be some of my worst
She finally met a man that’s gonna put her first
While I’m wide awake she’s no trouble sleeping
‘Cause when a heart breaks, no it don’t breakeven, even, no

What am I suppose to do
When the best part of me was always you and
What am I suppose to say
When I’m all choked up and you’re okay

I’m falling to pieces, yeah
I’m falling to pieces

They say bad things happen for a reason
But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding
‘Cause she’s moved on while I’m still grieving
And when a heart breaks, no it don’t breakeven, even, no

What am I gonna do
When the best part of me was always you
And what am I suppose to say
When I’m all choked up and you’re okay

I’m falling to pieces, yeah
I’m falling to pieces, yeah
I’m falling to pieces
(One’s still in love while the other one’s leaving)
I’m falling to pieces
(‘Cause when a heart breaks, no it don’t breakeven)

You got his heart and my heart and none of the pain
You took your suitcase, I took the blame
Now I’m tryna make sense of what little remains, oh
‘Cause you left me with no love and no love to my name

I’m still alive but I’m barely breathing
Just prayed to a God that I don’t believe in
‘Cause I got time while she got freedom
‘Cause when a heart breaks, no it don’t break
No it don’t break, no it don’t breakeven, no

What am I gonna do
When the best part of me was always you
And what am I supposed to say
When I’m all choked up and you’re okay

I’m falling to pieces, yeah
I’m falling to pieces, yeah
I’m falling to pieces
(One’s still in love while the other one’s leaving)
I’m falling to pieces
(‘Cause when a heart breaks, no it don’t breakeven)

Oh, it don’t breakeven, no
Oh, it don’t breakeven, no
Oh, it don’t breakeven, no

till next time,
easy does it

Closing the Door the Right Way

‘To everything there is a season…’ Ecclesiastes 3:1
In life, relationships come to an end. How you handle such moments can influence and shape your future. You can’t enter the next season of your life properly if you don’t exit this one properly. So, try to close the door with grace – you may need to walk back through it some day. Close the door with forgiveness. Resentment will poison your attitude and your memories and destroy you from within. Leave the judging to God; He knows both sides. Close the door with your promises fulfilled. At great personal cost, Jephthah said, ‘…I have made a vow to the Lord that I cannot break’ (Judges 11:35 NIV). Your character is on the line here; whatever the price tag, keep your word, because God is listening when you give it! Try to close the door with courage. It’s not easy to face tomorrow when you feel alone, but remember, you are not alone. Jesus said, ‘…I am with you always, even unto the end of the world’ (Matthew 28:20). Close the door in God’s timing. Grieve your losses, but don’t get stuck in the past. King Saul represented the past but David represented the future. When God rejected Saul because he had displeased Him, God said to the prophet Samuel, ‘…”How long will you mourn for Saul, seeing I have rejected him… go; I am sending you to Jesse the Bethlehemite. For I have provided Myself a king from among his sons”‘ (1 Samuel 16:1 NKJV). Endings bring new beginnings. It’s all right to acknowledge the past and learn from it, but when God shuts the door it’s time to move into the future He’s prepared for you.

http://www.ucb.co.uk/word_for_today

…till next time
easy does it

 

Take A Moment

It has been a minute. Maybe more.
I have since signed a fresh employment contract that doesn’t sit well with my independent self. I am speaking to the legal buffs who will advise me on what steps to take in a bid to achieve a semblance of peace of mind.

In other news, I came out of a rather fulfilling relationship, it was one of those ‘burn so bright, and if I can’t have it all, then it has to die swiftly’ type of relationship. This occurred 4months ago, and now is when I can share the news with you. Can’t say I know how He is, I’m sure He’s doing great. I imagine He took it pretty hard, what with de-friending me on #facebook and doing a bloody good job of not running into me at His Booth, or at JK’s…it has been somewhat easy moving on from that. I wish Him love, wealth, joy, and health. I’ll admit, I will miss the prospect of travelling with Him and mailing our travel trinkets to our home, such that on our return, we’d find all these boxes of goodies that require us to un-pack ‘em hugs, xoxo Dr.

I am considering the move into television. I’ll let you know how that goes, after my visit later this afternoon.

I graduated with a Bachelors of Information Technology of Makerere University two Fridays ago. Now I can add B.IT Muk to my name

I’ve taken to baking cakes and cookies, in the hope of adding another stream to my lone tributary of income, it is slow, considering most of my friends would rather taste (scratch that, make it EAT) the cakes and cookies than pay for the goodies. Plus I need to figure out how to incorporate the numbers I put it against the numbers I hope to make from this venture.

Through these all, God has been good and continues to be.
till next time
easy does it…

I Know They Still Make ‘Em Like This

Baby come to me
I will chase your tears away
Put your trust in me
Girl I swear I’ll never change
Darling you will see
That my love is here to stay
I promise you, I will be true
From here and now, forever girl

I said I love you
I said I care
When I tell you I love you
It mean I always will be there
I’ll never leave you
I ain’t goin’ nowhere
When I tell you I love you
Cross my heart I will be there

Open up your heart
Don’t be afraid to love again
We can take it slow
You should know I understand
Baby take your time
And I don’t care how long it takes
‘Cause I promise you, I’m here for you
From here and now, forever girl I

And I will be there
(and I will be there for you)
Forever sincere to you
(girl I’ll always care for you)
I just wanna share my life with you
Right here, right now, forever girl I

Funny, this life we live :)

This story is somewhat lengthy, and I’ll tell in in bits and pieces….not tonight though
till next time,
easy does it

And then I spent a couple of minutes in the company of this amazing Lady…listen/read on

So it seemed, that it was cool, for everyone to be in a relationship but me..

So I took matters into my own hands… and ended up with him

Him who displayed the characteristics of a CHEATER, a LIAR, an ABUSER, & a THIEF

So.. why was I surprised when he broke into my heart?

I called 911, but I was cardiac arrested for aiding and abetting,

Cause it was ME who let him in…

Claiming we were “just friends”..

It was already decided for me by the first date, that even if he wasn’t!

I was gonna make him ‘The One’..

You know… I was tired of being alone,

And I simply made up in my mind, that it was about that time so I decided to drag him along for the ride,

Cause I was always the bridesmaid & never the bride..

A virgin in the physical, but mentally just a grown woman on the corner in heat!

Who was tired of the wait!

So I was gonna make him ‘The One’.

He had a… form of Godliness… but not much..

But hey, hey I can change him! So (honey) I’ll TAKE him, I mean he’s close… enough

Ready to sell my aorta for a quarter, not knowing the value of its use to me

Arteries so clogged with MY will, it blocked HIS Will from flowing through me

So, I thank Christ that His blood pressure gave this heart an attack,

That flat lined my obscured vision, put me flat on my back

Through my ignorance He sawed,

Through my sternum He sawed & cracked open my chest

To transplant Psalm 51:10

A new heart & a renewed right spirit within!

So now I fully understand,

Better yet I thoroughly comprehend,

How much I NEED to wait… for You.

See, the bad thing is that I knew he wasn’t you from the beginning..

Cause in the beginning was the Word

And he didn’t even sound or shine like Your Son

Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks,

And all he could whisper was sweet, empty nothings –

Which meant NOTHING.

He couldn’t even pray when I NEEDED him to

Asking him to fast would be absurd!

So forget about being cleansed & washed with water through the Word…

But I know You.. ♥

You were already praying for me

Even never having met me

Let me assure you, I will wait for you.

I will no longer date, socialize or communicate with carbon copies of you

To appease my boredom or to quench my thirstiness I have for attention

And short-lived compliments from ‘sorta kindas’.

You know…. He ‘sort kinda’ right, but ‘sorta kinda’ wrong?

His first name LUKE,

His last name WARM.

I, I won’t settle for false companionship

I won’t lay in the embrace of his arms,

Attempting to find some closeness,

But never feeling so far apart cause, I just wanna be held

Cause ♫”all I gotta do is Say” No!

NO more ‘almost sessions’ of ‘almost coming close’

Passing winks & buying drinks,

I’ma, I’ma, I’ma flirt!♫

Who flirts with the ideology of,

‘Can you just tell me how much I can get away with & still be saved?’

NO more.

I’ll stay in my bed… alone, and write poems, about how I will wait for you

He won’t even come close,

Our fingers won’t even interlock

We won’t even exchange breath

Cause I have thoughts that I’ve ‘saved as’ in a file that God has only equipped you to open.

I will no longer get weighted down,

From so-called friends & family talks,

About the concern for my biological clock

When I serve the Author of Time.

Who is NOT subject to time,

But I’M subject to Him,

He has the ability to STOP, FAST FORWARD, PAUSE, or REWIND at any given time…

So if we could role play,

You would be Abraham & I would be Sara

Or you can be Isaac & I can be Rebecca – a servant’s answered prayer

I am bone of your bone, flesh of your flesh,

Made up of your rib Adam!

And once we meet, like electrons

I will be bound to your nucleus, completely indivisible atom.

We even speak the same math: 1 + 1 + 1 = 3, which really equals 1 if you add Him.

We were all created in His image,

But you have the ability to reflect, project & even detect the Son.

If I were to explain what you looked like,

You would have to look like a star,

A son of the Son..

I would gain energy simply from the light on me.

I would need you , in order to complete my photosynthesis

I await your revelation, but once again from the genesis, I will wait for you ♥

And I will know you… because when you speak I will be reminded of Solomon’s wisdom,

Your ability to lead will remind me of Moses,

Your faith will remind me of Abraham,

Your confidence in God’s Word will remind me of Daniel,

Your inspiration will remind me of Paul,

Your heart for God will remind me of David,

Your attention to detail will remind me of Noah,

Your integrity will remind me of Joseph,

And your ability to abandon your own will, will remind me of the disciples,

But Your ability to love selflessly & unconditionally will remind me of Christ.

But I won’t need to identify you by any special Matthews or any special Marks,

Cause His word will be tatted all over your heart.

And you will know me, and you will find me,

Where… the boldness of Esther meets the warm closeness of Ruth.

Where the hospitality of Lydia is aligned with the submission of Mary,

Which is engulfed in the tears of a praying Hanna.

I will be the one, drenched in Proverbs 31… waiting for you.

But to my Father, my Father who has known me before I was birthed into this earth

Only if you should see fit…

I desire Your will above mine,

So even if you call me to a life of singleness,

My heart is content with YOU – the One who was sent.

YOU are the greatest love story ever told,

The greatest story ever known

You are forever my judge & I’m forever Your witness

And I pray that I’m always found on a mission about my Father’s business

Oh, I will always be Yours!

And I will always wait for You Lord, more than the watchmen wait for the morning…

More than the watchmen wait for the morning… I WILL WAIT ♥

thank you Janette Ikz

Themes and their baggage :)

I finally figured how to log in to my blog using this new theme although I must admit, it doesn’t capture my personality or lack there of

How I’ve missed writing these passed so many days -  and with them have been some amazing experiences and others not so rosy, can’t wait to tell you all about them.

Happy to be home

till next time
easy does it